


Vorpatril's accidental proposal

by manateehugger



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2014-03-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 07:27:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1379098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manateehugger/pseuds/manateehugger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Byerly and Ivan got really drunk at one of Miles's parties the other night. Someone might have proposed to someone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vorpatril's accidental proposal

Ivan awoke slowly, his head still throbbing from the party the night before. He swore, not for the first time, and probably not for the last time, that he would never touch his cousin’s maple mead again. He rose from the bed partway then paused in a panic, his breath catching. There was a man in his bed. Then he remembered that for the last few months there typically was a man in his bed. It was Byerly Vorrutyer. 

Ivan rolled out of bed and padded into the kitchen where he started the coffee pot and downed some pain meds. Then he went into the bathroom to piss. While washing his hands he noticed the bruise on his neck. It was another hickey, courtesy of By. He touched it lightly thinking about how odd it was that he would be sleeping with a man. There was nothing wrong with that of course. His Betan aunt had drilled that idea into his head long ago. But before this began with By, Ivan could not have pictured himself in bed with a man much less enjoying it. Still, he didn’t know how to tell his mother much less his extended family about it and he hadn’t mentioned it to his friends. By had been patient and had allowed them to hide the relationship. When he was in a certain mood By even joked that all the sneaking around made it a proper affair. Still, Ivan supposed he would have to work up to telling everyone about it someday. Just not today, Ivan decided. 

Ivan stepped out of the bathroom in time to see Byerly padding into the kitchen in all his naked glory. By was swearing under his breath as he grabbed Ivan’s pain meds off the table and downed a few with water. The movement brought Ivan’s attention to the one object that By was wearing. It was a purple and pink plastic ring on his ring finger. The kind that his cousin had put in goodie bags for his younger guests the night before. Ivan burst out laughing.

By raised an inquiring eyebrow.

“Did one of the pipsqueaks propose to you last night,” Ivan asked.

“As a matter of fact, you did,” By said. His eyes danced in dark amusement.

Ivan snorted, “if I did that I would never be able to live it down. My mother would kill me.”

“She did retire before your proposal. But I hope when she hears about it she will still bless our union,” By said with a smirk.

Ivan frowned at this, he hated it when By played mind games with him. Instead of continuing this he went over to his commconsole which was now blinking. He turned on the program without activating the vid pickup so they could hear the person on the other end but neither party could see each other. Considering that By and Ivan were both stark naked this was probably for the best.

“Well Ivan, I just wanted to congratulate you on finally proposing to someone, even if it was Byerly Vorrutyer. I was going to call earlier but Ekaterin made me wait,” Miles’s smug voice said.

Ivan looked between By and the blank screen before speaking, “By already tried to pull that prank on me. It is not funny.”

“I’m not joking. Little Edy was quite put out when you took her ring and used it to propose to By. You had promised to return it to her,” Miles said. 

“I’m sure you had plenty more for her,” Ivan said, feeling slightly guilty.

“After some searching around yes. But it was touch and go for a while,” Miles reported.

“Ok, well maybe I did give By a ring. But I bet I was so drunk by that point I wasn’t even speaking coherently,” Ivan argued. 

“Actually you shouted that you loved me and that you wanted us to be together forever. Then you got down on one knee and asked me to marry you,” By filled in, helpfully.

“Byerly is that you? I was just about to call you next. First to congratulate you and then to berate you for letting Ivan get that drunk. You know damned well this could blow up into a major scandal. I don’t know what you were thinking that you didn’t warn Gregor about your relationship before this,” Miles commented.

By shrugged, not that Miles could see the motion.

“I didn’t realize that Ivan was so serious about us,” By admitted.

“Then why did you say yes,” Ivan demanded.

By smiled, “well from what I heard about the last proposal at Vorkosigan house, I figured for the sake of future couples I had better say yes.”

Miles made a rude noise on the other end of the commconsole call.

“So we’re officially engaged,” Ivan asked.

“Seems that way,” By mused.

“Well I’ll leave you two love birds alone. I’m sure others will be calling to congratulate you as well,” Miles said. He made it sound like a threat. 

Ivan stumbled back into his room and pulled some clothes on. At least he should be presentable if his boss called to fire him. Homosexuality was still a reason for a dishonorable discharge in the Barrayaran military, no matter how much Cordelia railed against homophobia. 

“Look on the bright side Ivan, you were trying to duck a promotion anyway. This will definitely help that,” Byerly offered with vulgar good cheer. Ivan briefly considered strangling him.

Another call came in on his commconsole and Ivan answered it. Admiral Vortugalov, Ivan's boss's face appeared.

“Sir, I just want you to know that there are a lot of strange rumors going around and it can be confusing-“ Ivan began.

“Cut to the chase Vorpatril. Did you or did you not propose to Byerly Vorrutyer,” Vortugalov asked.

Ivan bit his lip and looked at By who was watching him intently.

“I did sir,” Ivan admitted.

Vortugalov shook his head, “Well, while I don’t approve of this funny business I have my orders from on high that you are to keep your job. Apparently his highness thinks you could be a test case for allowing homosexuality in the military. Pray that you do not mess this up. Good day Lord Vorpatril.”

With that Vortugalov cut the comm. Ivan rested his head on the desk. Great, his boss was pissed at him and from now on all eyes would be on him to see if he slipped up. Just what he wanted, an angry boss and lots of bad attention.

By stroked Ivan’s hair. For a moment Ivan thought he could forgive the Vorrutyer bastard for saying yes to his proposal.

Then he got another commcall, this one from his mother. Ivan thought about not taking it, but she managed to override his systems and her face appeared.

“Maman, I’m sorry, I can explain,” Ivan began.

“The only thing you need to explain Ivan Xav Vorpatril is what you think you were doing proposing to Byerly Vorrutyer with a plastic children’s ring. While I am not thrilled with – well, let’s discuss that later. I would have expected you to take the time to find a suitable ring for Byerly rather than just taking something that had just been lying about. That was tacky and classless and I will be coming over this afternoon so we can go shopping for appropriate rings for the both of you,” Lady Alys declared.

“Yes mamam,” Ivan said in resignation.

“Furthermore, I understand that you are both male and thus lack some necessary parts for producing an heir. I still fully expect you to deal with this problem. After the wedding of course. But I don’t think it will hurt to discuss things with an appropriate in vitro fertilization specialist. So I’ve made an appointment with a Dr Germaine Flethir, a fellow I had recommended to Gregor when he and Laisa were starting their children,” Lady Alys continued.

“Isn’t it a bit early to be discussing this,” Ivan asked. He was already thinking about his comfortable apartment becoming infested with children. It was terrifying.

“Well I left you to your own devices for courtship and you ended up drunkenly proposing to a man with a plastic ring. I will not allow any such thing to happen again. I will be over in an hour, please be ready to go ring shopping and see to it that Byerly Vorrutyer comes as well,” Lady Alys said before cutting the call.

Ivan stared at the blank screen and buried his head in his hands.

“You know if Gregor calls I’m faking my own death and running away,” Ivan threatened.

By snorted, “you threaten that every other week.”

Then By walked over and kissed Ivan’s neck.

“You know what your problem is,” By asked.

“What,” Ivan demanded.

“Too many clothes,” By said judiciously.

“Hmmph,” Ivan murmured allowing By to kiss him.

“Looks like today is going to be a hard day for you. We’ve got an hour before your mother shows up. Let me show you that I’m worth the trouble,” By said leading Ivan back to bed.


End file.
